A Letter To The Skunk Family...

from here.

Dear Skunk Family Living Under My Shed,

I hope this missive finds you all in good health and keeping cool under these severe heat conditions. It's been quite some time since I've noticed your existence in my garden. At first I thought you were just passing by.. crossing from one yard to another on your merry way. I began to question your frequent visits, when my dear fella almost mistook one of you for a kitty...yes, he called you over and you gingerly acquiesced and approached him happily. Naturally he exited the premises, quite quickly mind you, upon noticing that you were not in fact a kitty cat.

Twas not long after that, when I went out one evening to water my flower beds. I turned on the lights in the tent/gazebo and just when I was about to enter, I heard some scurrying nearby. Lo and behold!! There were two of you making your way past me. Yes, I froze in place hoping you'd ignore me...thankfully you did. One of you was actually quite adorable and little. I guess you were the baby strolling with your Mama. Needless to say, I backed up slowly...farther into the yard...and watched you both disappear under the shed. Not far behind, near my fence was a third one in your clan. I believe it may have been Papa skunk foraying the premises for your evening meal. How good of him to take care of you so well. I hope he succeeded and brought home the bacon. 

I've spied each of you at one point or another since that night. Just this evening I braved the very warm weather and went out to quench my flower beds. Hose in hand and humming a happy tune, I sprayed the flowers whose sigh of relief was almost audible. Mr. Knightley watched me from the dining room window...at least I thought he was watching me. *sigh* 

No. I wasn't the subject of his attention for LO & BEHOLD, once again, I was accompanied by you...the cute family of skunks. No doubt you watched me while you did what you do when you do what you do in the yard. (I hope you all got that!) 

You must've been quite amazed at my bravery, though some may call it stupidity, of not budging from my spot and continuing to water my plants. Oh don't worry. I kept an eye on each of you. One ran into the hostas and went right back under the shed. The other (I guess it was Papa) continued sniffing around for supper, and the third strolled into the tent/gazebo. You must've heard me loudly exclaim.."Oh No You Didn't!!!" *insert vexatious mutterings* Yes..I believe Mama skunk was making good use of my lounge chair. I decided to mind my business and quickly finish what I started out to do. 

Twas then I decided I've had enough!

This brings me to the reason behind this letter. I am quite honored that you chose Harmonie House's garden as your home. It shows you have fine tastes..you are indeed skunks of quality and distinction. However, I can no longer risk the possibility of myself or my fella vexing one of you and getting sprayed. Please, do not take offense. It's not that I think your scent lacks in essence. Truly it's got the quality that's in a class by itself. It's just not for everyone...myself included. So I'm asking you to please pack your bags and find another shed in another garden...somewhere far away. Thank you for your cooperation and have a nice day. *smiles*

 Whaddaya mean we gotta move???

Consider yourselves evicted!

Sincerely,

Miss Sandra

second photo from here.